-
#429
Who's the biggest prostitute in history?
Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
-
#481
Yo momma so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.
-
-
#840
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
-
#267
The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty.
-
#177
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, for instance when you push them down the stairs.
-
#411
What animal has five legs?
A pitbull returning from a playground
-
#592
What’s brown and very bad for your dental health?
A baseball bat.
-
#421
What is yellow and makes moms happy in the morning?
The school bus.
-
#488
Knock knock. Who’s there?The door.
-
#377
Two Elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
-
#502
I dreamt I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow. When I woke up, my pillow was gone.
-
#627
Life is like toilet paper, you're either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.
-
#547
It's so cold that I have to take half a Viagra so I won't pee on my shoes.
-
#547
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
-
#177
How many times do I have to flush before you go away?
-
#877
I love every bone in your body, especially mine.
-
#377
You have the perfect face for radio.
-
#777
Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
-
#572
FRIDAY is my second favorite F word.
-
#257
"Age is just a number" "Yeah and prison is just a place"
-
#482
be honest, you googled your self
-
#522
Chuck Norris can write with an eraeser
-
#477
Chuck Norris recorded the making of the first video camera.